It turns out i can only write about what happened .

" Whenever you and i talk we end up talking about either food or sex or sometimes both"
-Shredder

It does not do to dwell in dreams and forget to live
-Albus Dumbledore

Goat Quotes

"Mom told me a story long time back about why she is a veggie" ..... . " There was once a goat and he lived a full happy life with his owner whom he loved and admired. One day he went for a walk with his owner.. to visit one of the owners friends he thought. Strange place this friend lived in. Shiny Sharp objects... Red stains on his shirt..... Weird large cut objects hanging from the ceiling .... He was made to lie on a cold metal table. And slowly the hand raised .. And just as the knife starts to come down on his neck, he lifts his head and looks towards his owner and goes.. "Maaaayyyyyyyyyyy"...
And that's why I eat goats "


"He could have looked at me with his right eye... but no... This Goat decided to turn his head all the way around and look at me with his left eye"


"If a goat looks at its reflection it WILL get confused. It will believe it is another goat"
--And this particular law of goats saved my life as a child

Shame in a brown bag

"Is this O.K?" Asks the shop keeper avoiding your eyes holding something under the table.
You have to strain your neck and literally climb over the counter to see if it was 'O.K' . You really want to take a closer look at the box or see if he has any other types or flavours, but his embarrassment slowly becomes your embarrassment and you just want to get out of there so you nod your head . He quickly puts the box into a brown paper bag and hands in to you slowly trying to contain a smirk. You ignore it, quickly pay the bill and walk out of the shop with any dignity you can muster. You know that as soon as you leave the salesmen will start to giggle and talk amongst themselves. Ashamed? Are you?

Please ....like no one else does it.